Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Unspring cleaning

I never feel like I have enough kitchen cabinet space. That is, until I decide to take everything out of them and clean them. Today I thought that would be a grand idea -- I would clean out all the cabinets and drawers and the pantry and also sweep and mop! All this before work! Plus I'll run some errands! Oh, and plus I'll also style my hair for the first time in months (meaning no ponytail)!

I got through 4 cabinets and two drawers. And sort of tidied the pantry. I still have 7 more drawers and 8 more cabinets to go. And I have to get ready for work now. I don't think I have time to do my hair, either.

I think what makes it so time-consuming is living with a packrat. I had to lay out the 400 straws he's collected and the 100 matchbooks (in addition to the hundreds he's decided to store in the backyard fireplace for fear they will spontaneously combust) to show him that we don't need anymore straws or matches. No more, ever. His reason for the matchbooks is that one time a really long time ago, there was this friend of a friend who didn't like him. The friend of a friend's brother collected matchbooks. So Mark started getting them and then brought them to friend of a friend, who was so happy that he loved Mark after that. He no longer sees friend of a friend, though, so I'm not quite understanding.

I like to get rid of things. He doesn't. I am trying to figure out right now if I can get rid of the 2002 New Year's champagne flutes because:
a) I didn't meet him until later in the year 2002, so they aren't something we shared, so I suppose they should hold no sentimental value to him, right? Naturally.
b) There's simply not room in the cabinets
c) You look like an idiot handing out New Year's 2002 glasses for any occasion other than New Year's 2002, which I'm pretty sure won't be happening again.
d) We have had champagne exactly twice since we've known each other, other than our wedding, and we have three sets of really nice champagne flutes.

I can guarantee you that none of the reasons will convince Packy A. Rat, so usually what I have to do is put them in a box in the garage, wait a few years, and then toss them out after I'm sure he's never noticed they weren't around. And that is what it's like when someone who likes to get rid of unneeded things marries someone who likes to keep everything forever. It's hard. It's really hard.

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