Oh, all right. I'm just kidding. I just got back from Cancun, and it was fabulous. But I'm a bit pissed about one thing.
You see, Mexico has its problems. Such as the narcos running about chopping off people's heads. And, what, hundreds of women murdered in Juarez? Not to mention that everybody's poor (looks like we're joining the club over here) and that Americans are often abducted and are urged not to travel in many parts of the country. So, I guess I just don't get it when Mexico considers some nice lady and her knitting a threat to international security. You see, they confiscated my knitting needles. And not just any knitting needles, but my BRAND-NEW ADDI TURBOS!!!!!!!!! Addis are basically the Mercedes Benz of knitting needles, and I had just paid $17 for them right before the trip. Oh, and they didn't just confiscate them, they took scissors and cut the needles off. In front of me. Essentially ripping my still-beating heart from my chest.
Now, before you non-knitters go off and start agreeing with them, let me say a few things.
1. The TSA has approved knitting needles for taking on planes. I accept that the TSA is part of America and not Mexico. But I always take my knitting on board to keep me occupied, and it's never been an issue before. I was allowed to take it on the plane on the way to Mexico.
2. Please view the photo below and tell me how this apparatus is any more dangerous than a number of other things you can take on a plane. Say, a sharpened pencil. Or the permitted "Scissors - metal with pointed tips and blades shorter than four inches" or "Screwdrivers (seven inches or less in length)." If you're worried I may take the cord and choke a pilot to death, I could probably do that better with the tie from my jacket, which was also with me.
Consider that if I wrapped my hand around my kntting needle in the manner you would have to in order to stab someone, I would have less than 2 inches left to dig into the person. I could do better damage with a full-length sharpened pencil, which I'm sure even Mexico allows onto planes.
Whether I'm in the wrong or the right, I was still filled with a rage I have never before known when that cabron yanked it from my hands and snip-snipped the cords -- and in the process let half my stitches fall off the cord.