Guess who is 2?

The Baby Brock is not a baby anymore! He's 2 now, and boy did those terrible twos hit right on schedule! He totally embarrassed me at IHOP yesterday when I met up with a friend, and he's been having some nasty tantrums.

We also have a bit of a problem with biting and scratching. 99.9% of the time it's done in play but today I'd say was the first time he did it because he was mad at me. He also gets a little rough when playing with kids. He's having a good ol' time, but they don't think the pushing or biting is so much fun. I'm not entirely sure what to do about this because nothing has been effective so far. I really hope he outgrows it soon, but meanwhile, I'm open to suggestions!

Here are some pictures from his birthday:

High in the sky

We went to Phoenix last month on our first trip with Brock. I put all these pictures on here and forgot to publish the post! Poor Brock didn't sleep well away from home, so it was sort of rough. He did go nuts for the airplane, though! Sorry the third picture seems to have a mind of its own.

I was having trouble with the photos in this post, so I apologize for the lack of captions. But in the second picture, Brock saw a "beeb," or bird preening itself above the window and was so incredibly excited.

Brock star for a day

Brock got to be in the paper. His dad and I both work there, so it was really more just luck. They needed a cute little guy to illustrate a parenting story and thought of Brock. The section editor kept thanking us, and we're like, "Shouldn't we be thanking you?" This is totally awesome!

What's even better is that the title is, "Raising the Perfect Child." I mean, could've been a story about dealing with nightmarish toddlers or something, right?

Sage is one of the Albuquerque Journal's magazines -- an occasional insert designed for women printed up on lovely glossy. The story didn't feature him or us. He was just the "photo illustration." But there was a little blurb about him on the story inside:

Mark and I also wrote a little blog on our parenting philosophies for the website. You can find that here.

Here are some pictures from the photoshoot. These photos are courtesy Morgan Petroski/Albuquerque Journal.

Also exciting was when they decided to do some billboard ads with him.

Digital image of billboard

Actual billboard

OK, was that obnoxious enough for you? Sorry to be such a braggart, how often does your kiddo get to do something like this and be on a billboard? So, thanks for putting up with me!

Don't smell until the timing is correct. Seriously, just don't.

My husband likes smells. Like good smells. He buys lots of air freshener, shoe spray, cologne (like dozens of them), candles, etc.

A while back, he bought some really expensive air freshener while on vacation. It came in a tiny glass bottle and cost like $1,000. It smelled just like Endust. Yeah, the dusting spray. It's awful. Nothing you can try to cover with it could smell worse than this stuff. If you just took a dump, light a match, but don't spray Endust, right? Incidentally, the bottles say, "Do Not use on polished/painted surfaces." I suppose many people must mistake it for dusting spray.

So recently he decided to write the company and tell them that he thought the products may have spoiled on the shelf.
Here was his message:

From: Mark **** <((redacted email address))>
Subject: product disappointment
To: ((redacted email address))
Date: Tuesday, April 3, 2012, 4:07 AM


Hi,                        

April 3, 2012 I purchased two bottles of your air conditioners a couple of months ago at the **** in Las Vegas. Unfortunately, there wasn't a test bottle, so I hadn't tried either. But I figured they would have a nice spa-scent, and at $48 a bottle, I figured they would be exquisite quality. I have more than 40 colognes, a number of air fresheners and I'm quite a spa aficionado, but the products just didn't go over well at my home for either my wife or I, or my office. I thought it was just too strong of  a scent for us, but have since tried to give them away to various couples, but they had the same negative reaction. I really think they might have been on the shelf too long. The scents are: - Archangel Uriel - Hilarion Any way, I was just wondering if there is any way to ship them to you and have them replaced for something else? If you notice they have gone bad, you could send the same ones (although that would be my last choice). But I would really like to try something else. As you'll see, both bottles are nearly full. If you can help me, I'd really appreciate it. If not, I understand. Please let me know. Thank You Mark Smith ((contact info redacted))

Pretty diplomatic, right?
Well, this was the reply.

From: Debbie Blake <((email redacted))>
Subject: Re: product disappointment
To: "Mark *****" <((email redacted))>
Date: Tuesday, April 3, 2012, 8:53 AM

Hello Mark,

Thank you for contacting me.  Unfortunately I can not take the products back and give you a replacement.  The **** in Las Vegas has closed there doors for some time now.  But what I would like to do is give you a little insight into the product and how you might understand the energetics that are going on with them and yourself.  I have a web site up if you would like to look into this a little more.  www.northamerica-aurasoma.com

First Archangel Uriel.  The colors are gold on the top and royal blue on bottom.  The Equilibrium bottle is B097 http://www.northamerica-aurasoma.com//product_info.php?products_id=459  Also the product of the month is Archangel Uriel http://www.northamerica-aurasoma.com/information.php?info_id=31

Over the years of being a teacher and practitioner of Aura-Soma I have seen students not be ready for a product there fore they have a negative reaction to it.  What that tells me the timing is not correct and there is other work to address first. Once this is recognize and address the negative reaction leaves and the student is open to these energies.  The gold of Archangel Uriel is talking about Universal Wisdom coming through the intuitive senses of your body.  There could be a real resistance to becoming intuitive to your fullest being because of something that has happened in the past.  Please check out the home page of my site to have a greater understanding of what I am talking about.

The Hilarion Air Conditioner is a truth seeker.http://www.northamerica-aurasoma.com//product_info.php?cPath=35_48&products_id=143  It is also B053 http://www.northamerica-aurasoma.com//product_info.php?cPath=35_48&products_id=143

This energy is asking us to look into the deepest areas of our heart and recognize the trapped emotional blocks that we are holding onto.  Once they are released we open ourselves to move into a new direction.

I know this is allot of information and if you would like a consultation to have a greater understanding please feel free to contact me and we can set up an appointment. 

I send my very best and wish you an insightful journey.

Much love and light,

Debbie

Debbie Blake

North America Aura-Soma LLC

((contact info redacted)

So, let's get this straight. We thought their ridiculously over-priced products stunk (literally) and rather than apologize or replace them, they blame us for not being emotionally prepared for their air freshener? I love this quote: "There could be a real resistance to becoming intuitive to your fullest being because of something that has happened in the past."

I never realized that one must complete counseling and perhaps graduate from some scent academy in order to find an air freshener pleasant. It's weird because Lysol never gave a shit if I took classes.

This is where Mark gets Marky. He's not a guy who likes to take crap from people, or waste money. (The red part is my emphasis on hilarity.)

From: Mark **** <((email info redacted))>
Subject: Re: product disappointment
To: "Debbie Blake" <((email info redacted))>
Date: Sunday, April 8, 2012, 3:59 AM

Deb,
First of all, the **** has not closed down.
Secondly, you are a teacher?
Of what?
Misspellings and bad grammar?
You obviously know that your products suck, and now I know it wasn't simply a bad bottle.

So here's what you do teach: spray a couple of bottles of that garbage up your schnoz, run free and naked in your new-age full-of-crap factory -- then jump into a pool of reality.

I'll be sure to tell the directors of the **** you are spreading the word about them being closed.

Mark

Oh my God. I hadn't laughed that hard in a long time. Gotta love those middle-of-the-night emails. Needless to say, we haven't yet signed up for consultations on insightfulness. And we still think the air fresheners smell like cleaning chemicals. 

But upon reading the website she referred to, I learned some important things, like this:

"I have found that when you ask the appropriate questions the bottles will reveal your comprehensive sequence to unlocking a more evolved you."

 Magic bottles!

"Your unconscious does not understand the language of color. Aura-Soma can show you what needs addressing so you can move forward in a language the unconscious does not understand. Color is the KEY to unlocking the unconscious. Once the resistance is removed. You can receive your divine gifts that are yours and it can bring more joy, bliss, pleasure, peace and abundance into your life." 

All that from a magic bottle! A stinky one at that!

Then I found that the Archangel Uriel scent has more powers! (Again, red is my emphasis, this time on oddness):

"It helps to support the growth towards clarity of intuitive perception, to use awareness with compassion, with warmth. It may awaken awareness of fear and confusion, or the tendency to intellectualization, to empower the mind more then the intuitive faculties."

No wonder we're running scared of these products!

All my flaws, explained

I recently came across a really interesting post. I found it quite by accident. It was all about the development of the mouth/jaw/palate and how it relates to the way you breathe, or vice-versa really.

Part 1
Part 2

This may not sound really interesting to you. You probably have a normal mouth. With normal teeth. You probably didn't have eight years of orthodontic work, speech therapy and five oral surgeries of various types.

I have. And that's why I thought this was really neat stuff.

This is a mold of my teeth in 4th grade:

That was biting down. I couldn't even eat normally. I would bite off pieces of sandwiches with my molars.

Fast forward to now, and I've got decent enough teeth. I mean, if you're not looking hard, and we're just talking and what-not, I look fine. But the reality is that I still have a pretty darn big overbite and I'm really self-conscious about that. My teeth are healthy and everything, but despite all those years of work, they are far from perfect. When the years of torture drew to a close, I was told that my bite was not perfect, but it was as good as it would get with braces. I was told that if I wanted to achieve something better, I'd have to have my jaw broken and reset. I thought, "Well, they're good enough for me!" And I still feel that way if the alternative is a broken jaw wired shut.

But trust me, I'm self-conscious a lot. I feel like a beaver. I've been told that I just have a tiny jaw. But nobody ever explained WHY.

So that brings us to the point of this post: the blog I came across the other day. To sum it up, how you breathe (mouth or nose) as a baby/small child determines how your whole face looks. Why? Well, if you breathe through your nose, like you should, you close your mouth and it forms a seal. Your tongue goes to the roof of your mouth a bit of a ways behind your teeth and spreads out, which in turn spreads your palate.

On the other hand, if you breathe through your mouth all of the time, you don't have that spreading effect and end up with a narrow jaw -- but not just that. It affects the development of the entire middle part of your face. And you can end up with an overbite, weak chin and protruding nose.

People this totally describes me. And you probably are imagining I look a bit like this:

And, well, I kinda used to. See this post for more on that and what I really look like.

But I'm not that bad. Not really. I just think it is fascinating that all the things I've always sorta disliked about my face are entirely due to the way I breathed when I was little. I don't know for a fact that I breathed through my mouth, but I'd bet money. It's like the chicken and the egg: Do I find myself keeping my mouth a bit open because of the overbite, or do I have the overbite because I didn't keep my mouth closed? I don't really know. But please don't call me a "mouth breather." My dad already says we have hillbilly blood, and I just don't need that.

Watch out, ladies

He's been working out.

(and yeah, this is an exact replica of a Facebook post. Because I lack creativity tonight.)

Working on something

A little project in progress. It's a gift. I am pretty sure this person doesn't know about my blog, but I'll still keep quiet for now.

Did you miss me? Oh, you didn't even notice I was gone?

So ... it's been a while. A really long while. I think about you often, all 3 of you who come to visit. But I keep telling myself I will wait till I have something interesting to say. But I never do. Isn't that sad?

Or I'll think of something semi-amusing but then realize that it's more Facebook status update material. And I think that the only people who bother to read this blog are probably friends of mine on FB anyway.

The more I hope for inspiration, the less it comes to me. I used to share creative projects, but I have absolutely no time for myself anymore. You know, work, 1-year-old, dirty house, husband. That's how it goes.

I still work at a newspaper 3 nights a week as a copy editor. I've been there 10 years. But I also work for Warehouse Fabrics Inc. doing a sewing blog. And then I started handling their social media. And then I started handling their monthly newsletter. And then I started handling their new inventory, posting it to their website. This is both thrilling and tedious because, on the one hand, I get to admire many beautiful fabrics, and that's almost better than sewing. It's like hanging out at a fabric store all day, and who doesn't love that? On the other hand, sometimes I feel a bit swamped and struggle to find time when Brock isn't whining and pulling on my arm to get up and follow him.

Last month there was a particularly huge amount of new fabrics and it took me weeks to finish. Now we are working on a temporary project to recategorize everything on the site for search purposes. I love me a good organizing project, so for that reason I like it. But, again, sometimes I stare at my kitchen floor and think about how it would be nice if my feet didn't stick to it and I didn't have to worry about my son picking up typhoid as he rolls his cars around on it.

I'm eternally grateful to Warehouse Fabrics Inc. for the opportunity to earn money from home doing stuff I really like -- sewing, working with fabrics, writing and computer stuff. It's fantastic. But I am definitely not finding the time to blog much over here. And, you know, I don't really care. I'm so totally lucky to have this gig.

On top of regular life, I was dragged into helping to plan my high school reunion. It's this summer, in July. July is kind of freaking me out.

First weekend: Stepsister's wedding/dad's birthday
Second weekend: Son's birthday
Third weekend: 3-day class reunion that I'm responsible for, in part.
Fourth weekend: 7th wedding anniversary

Phew!

I'm a little worried about how Brock will deal with the reunion weekend when we have to be out late. We could get a room at the hotel, but he refuses to sleep in a bed with us (there may be a baby-sitter on-site). As a matter of fact, he flat out refuses to sleep anywhere but his crib. Which is why we haven't traveled with him. I know that eventually he has to fall asleep, but by then, will we all be exhausted to the point of not having any fun? We don't have a baby-sitter, and my husband isn't very quick to trust a stranger in our house. We don't have any family members who would want to sleep at our house or stay there till 12:30 a.m.

The things I fret about for half a year, I tell you.

So that's my life. Busy. Kind of unexciting to everyone else, but really, really good.

I'll leave you with a slew of cutey-pie videos of the BrockMonster. Like you're going to watch them all, I know.

Locked in the Closet





Carousel Jabbering





Carousel Heaven





She's Not My Girlfriend!





Crazy Hair





No iPhone

Christmas

Yes, yes, we are all over Christmas, aren't we? It's Jan. 7, after all. But I haven't posted in a while and thought I'd better give you a very important update on what Brock got for Christmas so you can all stop holding your breath.

First up were these really cool talking dinos. They talk to each other!

This was the first gift he opened. I loved his reaction. First he's like, "What's this stupid box covered in paper?" Then we start tearing the paper off ...



Then there's the excited dino reax



And the dino used as vaccum




I got him an Alphaberry, which has lots of buttons with the letters of the alphabet on them and a small screen. It also reads the letters to him. He immediately thought it was his own cell phone and nearly had a heart attack.

He also got a tool bench, but he's not that interested in that. Like father, like son, I guess.

I later regretted not bothering to wash or style my hair because I look atrocious in most of the Christmas photos. I was too busy worrying about getting a turkey dinner on the table. This photo was the least offensive.

Brock's aunt and grandma got him a Cars big wheel. It doesn't even matter that he can't reach the pedals. It has an awesome dashboard that makes lots of noises, so just sitting on it is the bomb.

Christmas is immediately followed by Mark's birthday.

Mark's friend came over and his son and Brock were in serious agreement about something or another:



All in all a merry holiday season here.